It’s simply a fact that virtually all people, especially kids, who bully and engage in that behavior have learned to respect only fear and power. Generally with kids, this is because they often don’t know better and have not received discipline and common empathy to teach them otherwise. Left alone this causes them to grow into young adults utilizing the same wrong minded philosophy. And ultimately if left unchecked they become adults who think it perfectly acceptable to bully others and abuse others to get their way. And this never leads to a positive or good result.
But as we can all attest, we first encounter it as children. Everyone has encountered a bully when they were kids at some point or another. It’s simply an unfortunate fact of life and growing up. And it can have lasting effects if it isn’t dealt with, and if a child doesn’t develop some type of effective solution to counter it and help them understand how and why it happens and how to deal with it. Tragically this can lead to negative and self damaging self images of themselves. A child begins to see themselves as possessing no more worth than what someone gives them. And this can have terrible lasting effects.
What is more, these negative self images can lead to other lasting problems, like weight gain, and health problems because they aren’t eating right, or being active in their lifestyle.
So one of the most effective means of dealing with bullying is to stop it before it starts.
And again, it is a sad, but no less true fact of life that most often that happens on the playground.
A bully ends up messing with the wrong kid who isn’t going to take it, and they hash things out the old fashioned way. Generally this tends to work out for the best because the bully learns a very harsh but valuable lesson.
They learn what the medicine tastes like that they’ve been dishing out. And they don’t like it.
And as kids will be kids they often enough get to talking about it afterwards and even become friends. The kids that don’t want to be bullied defend themselves, and because they don’t like being bullied, they don’t hold it over the other kids head, they don’t bully the bully, they just drop it and let bygones be bygones. The bully in turn realizes how hurtful they’ve been, and now have a black eye and a greater appreciation for not hurting others and acting unfairly.
And that is the key element to getting rid of bullies. A greater appreciation for others, or empathy. A common empathy for others around you and how they feel, and the impact you can have on how they feel.
We all want others to treat us the way we treat them.
But at the end of the day this generally only happens because the bullying is stopped,
And there simply isn’t a better system for teaching self defense and putting a stop to bullying than the martial arts. It teaches kids to have respect for themselves and for others around them. When they join up, it’s one of the very first lessons they learn. They learn to respect the instructor and to receive the instructor’s respect in return. And as well they learn to respect their classmates. So from the beginning they are learning the value and importance of treating others the way they want to be treated. Next they’re introduced to obedience and discipline. They must listen closely and do as they are told in order to learn and advance.
So throughout this process of learning to fight, and learning self defense they are learning valuable life skills, they are learning why they should fight, and when, and when it should stop.
They are learning maturity and virtue as well as learning fighting skills.
This necessarily, and by design creates a person fully capable of defending themselves, defending others, and putting a stop to bullying, while also creating a person who understands empathy and proper right mindedness.
In essence, they use their powers for good, not evil. SIlly sounding perhaps, but true.
Kids learn that they don’t have to be a victim. They learn self respect, and self confidence. They learn that they have a right to feel safe and protected, and their self image is not governed simply by what others accord them.
They are being groomed to become and grow into solid, mature, strong, and wise young adults.
This then creates a young person who is being raised to become a credit to their community and a productive member of it, as opposed to someone who might eventually prey upon it.
The methodology and system of the martial arts is something that has consistently produced good, strong, virtuous members of societies for thousands of years and it’s a system that works as efficiently today as it ever did. That’s why so many people practice it and so many encourage their kids to become involved. Because it’s a system that works.
Everyone has been terrorized by bullies at some point in their past. And everyone has been afraid. But martial arts helps kids overcome that fear and understand that it’s ok to feel it. But they don’t have to be ruled by it. Courage is simply the mastery of fear, not the absence of it. And they learn that they have value, and don’t have to be a victim. They can be strong, wise, and capable of dealing with bullies, and protecting and defending themselves efficiently.
And this merely helps create better adults, and human beings all the way around. So there’s every reason to look to the martial arts as a solution if you or someone you know is having problems defending themselves, or wrestling with a negative self image.
Article reposted with permission from Go2Karate.com.